It's early morning
I rise early, yes
But rarely this early.

I mean
Yes this post is at 7:30 in the morning
but I've been up since about 5.

I know why this is
But it doesn't stop me from being up.

I have things I need to do
I have things that are getting complex
and complex things irk me.

That, and I haven't really been online much recently
There are lots of news articles and whatnot
for me to catch up on.

Why?
Because there's no need for me to be online
I'm not that connected to any online community anymore.

Truthfully I'm not really connected to any community.

That's not to say I don't have contacts and acquaintances
I just get to them in due time.

but who cares, really?
Which is the point I suppose.
I think to some degree we all feel the need to justify our whereabouts
Even if we're speaking to no one in particular.

We want to feel like we belong
That somewhere out there in the world someone is listening
Or watching

Yet at the same time
I would feel incredibly creeped out if I thought someone was watching my every move.

Then again I suppose that's what they created Twitter for.
(Incidentally, yes I am on twitter.)

Sure, you can choose to tell everyone that you're taking a shit
Or buying groceries
Or flinging a hamster off a bridge
Or giving yourself a stranger
or any variety of other things

And people can choose to listen and respond
Or they can just ignore your shit and move on with their lives.
(The latter option is a very common response)

How is it that we can want to express almost every part of our lives
And still feel weirded out about doing it?

Who would create something like that?

It's like...with sex.
We all want to do it
It feels good and natural
But there are so many drawbacks
Like
Inherent flaws
in people.

You can be really kind to your neighbors
but a complete dick to your waiter
or retail associate.

my inevitable conclusion
is that people don't make any fucking sense.
They never have
and probably never will.

I suppose it's one of many things
that makes humans separate from the rest of the functional world
But I mean
Why?

Why are people like this?
Why are people so...people?
How can we be so brilliant and so incredibly fucked up?
So lucky and full of potential, yet so incredibly naive and ignorant?

Who the fuck would create something like that?

I don't know
I'm ranting.
I apologize.

My thoughts are scattered today.
Once again I find myself waiting
But in this waiting I am forced to dwell on my thoughts.

I have not taken pen to paper in a while
Nor have I finished changing my guitar strings
So I have some anxiety built up.
Some sense of accomplishment that's gone unfulfilled
And yes, it is frustrating.

I have also neglected cleaning
Which I should probably be doing instead of writing this post
But no post is unneeded.

...(U(*@#URJH!I@!@$O(!@& U)*(JI

...Fin.